Why Was This Doctor Different Than All Others?

I was supposed to be in Manhattan over the weekend in preparation for Passover in the Hamptons this week. Well, my kitty baby suffered some malaise after the Rick Steves event the other night and derailed things. OK, so I know you're all, "What Rick Steves event, AG?" Well, that's a newsworthy story that I'll try to post later this week, but let's keep the rolling stone with the moss going down hill. Too drunk to notice that she puked on Thursday night, I was awoken on Friday by a friendly voice with, "One of the kittens is sick."

Needless to say it was my little one and she continued to vomit on Friday and into Saturday. Compounding things was that she also developed diarrhea. Clearly, Manhattan was out on Friday night and Saturday morning. Instead, I may have scammed a visit to the vet. And when I say 'may', I mean -- AG did! I scammed it because the vet office of interest is rated tops in the Philadelphia burbs and they are not taking new patients. Given that my little one no longer lives full time with me, in emergencies I am at the mercy of the closest vet in the woods who can see her. Being AG, I got her in to the creme de la creme of vet offices. Rules, schmules! My baby was sick.

But what followed was a mystery wrapped in challah. The smoking hot, single, 40 plus (Yeah, I e-stalked him.) Jewish vet was boy vey! Given that I was hung over from Shabbos, I was not on my game when he said to my sick baby doll, "Aren't you the cutest? There are no cuter ones than you."

It occurred to me later that afternoon that any of the following lines are what I should have chased his platitudes with:

"Not as cute as Momma naked in your bed."

"Momma can show you something cuter."

"Well, this is going better than I would have expected. Do you think one of your techs can watch her while we go out tonight?"

"I bet our children will be cuter."

I'm not sure we have much of a future after I mumbled her Hebrew name at her and he looked at me funny. Perhaps I redeemed myself when he noticed me leaving in my Alfa. We'll find out when I take her back and suggest she's just not herself still and he and I should discuss it over dinner and over the shirt action at my country abode. And no, this is not my listing. Just in case you thought it was. more...